Well here I am, finally all packed and ready to go get on a plane this afternoon. Let me tell you, packing was not easy, and it was just as stressful as I thought it would be to simplify my life into 3 suitcases and 2 carry-ons (It does feel a little better knowing that my life takes up 3 suitcases and not 2...). But I'm better now and its just the waiting that's killing me. Especially since most of my closest friends have all packed up and tearfully departed themselves. Leaving myself (and some others who have it much worse in that they aren't leaving for a while yet) to sit around in anticipation of what I see and hear from them.
So I guess I am really getting very excited about leaving, but in many ways it hasn't clicked yet. Packing brought reality closer but I'm still in this sort of emotional limbo, caught between fear, anxiety, excitement, and stir-craziness, and it might not be for a whole other day when we touch down in Paris that I finally get it that I'm off to college in the craziest place in the world!
Whenever it "clicks", I know I'm just going to be jumping for joy and excitement. I am not afraid. This is not naivety, I know what I'm doing for the most part, but because the opportunity far outweighs the risk, there is no reason to be fearful. Sure I'm worried, about littler things like making friends and decorating my room, but there is no great fear.
I know some people have a problem with fear. They fear the unknown, the foreign, the strange, when really I see opportunity in those things. I think that to be afraid like that would lead to a sad and sheltered life, away from the world's true beauty. America has been a machine of diversity for a long time and it has made me sad to see those who close themselves off and decide to be afraid even today. Fear is the root of many of our problems in the USA: the financial crisis has turned into a recession because of people's fears, there is only an argument about health care because people are afraid of the government, and the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan are direct results of an entire nation being afraid. Now, some of this may be justified, but I personally would like a break, and I am excited to get one.
I am getting anxious to see what the world looks like on the other side. I want to know everything about everything. Well almost, statistics and biology still seem pretty BS to me. But everything else! I mean, really, look at the world and your life, ask yourself what's stopping you from doing the same? I mean, Saint Paul today, Paris tomorrow, Abu Dhabi next week... who knows where I will go? but the future is uncertain for EVERYONE! the trick, I think, is to embrace it, let it go where it takes you, but don't be afraid to do something amazing.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Packing...
This week has presented an interesting predicament for me; my desire to depart has been steadily growing, but my motivation to do anything, like pack, has fallen off a cliff and died. In addition, my friends and classmates are leaving left and right, which is not necessarily sad, but has definitely brought the reality of leaving to my door.
I have now helped two of my closest friends pack up their belongings and load up their cars, experiences which were sad, hard, and mildly stressful, as they brought upon me the realization that my life the way I know it is going to end on August 29th. And while this might seem to be a piece of motivation, so far, it has been the opposite, as I am now despairing over the idea that I have to pack my life into two suitcases. I mean, I'm not a materialistic person, I don't mind not having things around me, but the idea that many of the objects which describe me or meaningful to me can be put into a box is repulsive. Its an issue of perspective, the idea that the things we choose to symbolize us when we're not around can be reduced to a box in the attic or a suitcase or two.
So, for whatever reason, these sentiments have been barring me from making any progress on packing outside of a packing list, which I even refrained from until outside pressures made me cy excitement rising, that I can and will do SOMETHING today about packing. It will be sad, but I can do it. Besides, if I can't PACK, how will I ever survive the next 4 years? Well, thank you my friends who have shown me perspective and now strength, I've got to get to my suitcases now.
I have now helped two of my closest friends pack up their belongings and load up their cars, experiences which were sad, hard, and mildly stressful, as they brought upon me the realization that my life the way I know it is going to end on August 29th. And while this might seem to be a piece of motivation, so far, it has been the opposite, as I am now despairing over the idea that I have to pack my life into two suitcases. I mean, I'm not a materialistic person, I don't mind not having things around me, but the idea that many of the objects which describe me or meaningful to me can be put into a box is repulsive. Its an issue of perspective, the idea that the things we choose to symbolize us when we're not around can be reduced to a box in the attic or a suitcase or two.
So, for whatever reason, these sentiments have been barring me from making any progress on packing outside of a packing list, which I even refrained from until outside pressures made me cy excitement rising, that I can and will do SOMETHING today about packing. It will be sad, but I can do it. Besides, if I can't PACK, how will I ever survive the next 4 years? Well, thank you my friends who have shown me perspective and now strength, I've got to get to my suitcases now.
Friday, August 20, 2010
T-minus: 9 Days to Departure!
As I get closer to leaving, and life is getting a little more hectic, I thought I'd give the lo-down on the events in my life that I have found to be blog-worthy. Firstly, and most importantly, I have been accepted into the inaugural class of New York University Abu Dhabi, which means that I will be spending most of my next 4 years in the United Arab Emirates and other locations around the globe. This sort of college experience will be the first of its kind as I go off to study abroad, and abroad from abroad, for the entirety of my college education (I will have the opportunity to study abroad in New York City if I please!).
So, in part, this blog is to describe what its like to be a 4-year international student in a country that is not the US, and also in part so that those back home and afar can share in my adventures. As many have told me, my experience will be entirely unique and once-in-a-lifetime, and I hope to share it with the whole world, since really, what fun is an adventure if there's no one to hear about it?
My goal is to write such that any reader can take part in my experiences as they happen, and that anyone can learn something from anything that I have learnt. I undoubtedly will have my whole world flipped upside-down, shaken, then repositioned at an entirely new angle - more than once - and, as it happens, and as my views change or solidify, I will do my best to record what it is like to become a world citizen.
I dearly hope that I will come out of this a changed and improved person. Someone who more than ever, respects all people, loves all of life, and wants to make the world better for everyone and everything. I believe the seeds of all of these ideas are what won me admission into what will without a doubt become one of the premier learning institutions in the world, and it was the promise of a perfect environment to cultivate and grow my seeds that sold me on this adventure.
So, in part, this blog is to describe what its like to be a 4-year international student in a country that is not the US, and also in part so that those back home and afar can share in my adventures. As many have told me, my experience will be entirely unique and once-in-a-lifetime, and I hope to share it with the whole world, since really, what fun is an adventure if there's no one to hear about it?
My goal is to write such that any reader can take part in my experiences as they happen, and that anyone can learn something from anything that I have learnt. I undoubtedly will have my whole world flipped upside-down, shaken, then repositioned at an entirely new angle - more than once - and, as it happens, and as my views change or solidify, I will do my best to record what it is like to become a world citizen.
I dearly hope that I will come out of this a changed and improved person. Someone who more than ever, respects all people, loves all of life, and wants to make the world better for everyone and everything. I believe the seeds of all of these ideas are what won me admission into what will without a doubt become one of the premier learning institutions in the world, and it was the promise of a perfect environment to cultivate and grow my seeds that sold me on this adventure.
Besides, 7,500 miles isn't that far! Its way closer than any other life-bearing world that we know about, so why not travel around and discover what humanity has to offer? College is meant to be life-changing and radical, and I believe that I am pursuing that idea to the max. Thank you to everyone who has helped me to this point, and wish me luck as I dive into the world!
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